View All General Comment Abuse Story Death Story Chronic Pain Story       Please sign our Guestbook Name:Lori Email:[email protected] State: Type:Abuse Story Date:5/18/2002 I am 27 years old and im a grateful recovering addict of 10 months. I was addictive in addiction for 9 years. My choice of drug was lortabs and oxycontins. I have experienced all there is out there but that was my favorite. I would use theem over anything. I started my addiction in a result of a car accident which i was injured very bad. I was kept on lortabs for about a year non stop. I tried to tell my doctor but naturally he did take concern. So my drug abuse got terrible. I went from being a beautiful young girl both inside and out to nothing but per trash. Nothing matter to me but using. I had to use pills to get up in the mornings and all day to function. I used about 20-30 lortabs a day. Soon it came that they didnt get me high so I was introduced to oxycontins (oxys). So my daily dose of that would be around 7-8 80's (80mg). You hear of people saying hell on earth well that was my life nothing but hell. I lost myself, Friends, family , My home there was nothing left. I went to the street and i did what ever it took to get my drug. I broke the law, I lowered to any standard. I got to where I would pray to God that I would die I saw no future.Finally I was facing 10 years in prison for crimes i comitted to get my drugs. I had finally hit rock bottom.So i went to detox and begged for help. I stayed there 7 days. Vommitting, hot and cold sweats, headaches, severe body cramps,and no memeory , I was so very sick and i nearly simply died from detoxing. I was very close to having a stroke because by body couldnt handle coming off the drugs.But by the grace of God i made it. I went on to Rehab. After that I was in front of a General sessions judge facing 10 years. I was offered a very serious program called DRUG COURT! I took the program Not only did i want to stay clean and regain my life i didnt want to goto prison. I was sentenced and sentence was suspended providing that i completed the drug court progarm. I have know been in the program 10 months with about 7 more months to go. I couldnt be happier. They saved by life. I could never thank them enough. I had a second chance. There is hope.If you want recovery and you are willing to do whatever it takes to stay clean just the same as you were willing to do what ever it took to get high. There is HOPE!!!! Recovery is for life and at no time can you ever forget how bad it was. One day at a time and by the grace of God I have found a new way of life. I know have a home, my family and true friends, a job,and a wonderful boyfriend. I wouldnt trade it for anything. Drugs will destroy. Addiction will overcome you and make you become a person not only you will hate but the ones who love you will disappear.I cannot stress how much recovery means to me. I can know get up in the mornings and thank God for the day and look in the mirror and love whose looking back at me. People say i know have a glow about me. They see a heathly happy person who has come from hell. I know live my life through God and his will for me. Im not promised tomarrow but i know that for today Im living life and i no longer look to drugs to make me feel better I look to God and when my day is over I can lay my head down and know i did what was right. That a feeling you never what to give up. When you can bet an addiction theres nothing in this life you cant do. If you have read my story and you have lost hope i would love to share my strenghs and hope with you for I can only keep what i have by giving it away. My heart breaks for the still suffering addicts and those who have passed and never got that second chance. For I know the day i ever use again I to will pass. Im not ready. I hope to help others who have lost hope. Please feel free to email me if you need someone to listen are you want to know how to stop using. Never say it cant be done. [email protected]. God bless.   Name:ex oxy head Email:[email protected] State: Type:Abuse Story Date:5/18/2002 I wrote a letter to Mr. Bisch about 6 months ago and he posted the letter here on his site. I am actually very glad he did because i met and talked to a ton of other people who were going through the same thing as me. I also met a guy from Philly, which is where i am from, and with in a month of meeting him i was going up into his neighborhood to buy oxys when i couldnt find any in my neighborhood.....so that wasnt exactly a great result of our meeting. Anyway.....im finally clean!!!!! And im never gonna go back to being a slave to that drug again. Im a 27 yr old guy and i started messin around with pain killers back in my teen days. I didnt know much about them, but i knew they felt really good. When i was about 23, an 18 yr old kid from kensington (a North Philly Neighborhood) told me to stay away from Percs and vicodin because they give you a heroin like addiction. I thought i knew everything so i ignored him. Was i ever wrong. About the same time i met a "connection" who always had percs and these new things called OC's or oxys. He told me that one 40 mg oxy was like 8 percs, but it only cost $20 instead of the $32 that i would have spent on 8 single percs.....what a deal..ha. So that was the start of it and here i am 4 years later. So much has passed over those 4 years but its all just an oxy blur to me now. I have a million stories about those stupid fuckin pills, but i hate typing, so ill leave it like this....... Over that 4 year stretch i blew everything for oxycontin. Towards the end i was up to snorting about 6-8 40's a day. I tried to withdraw about 5 times, and finally succeeded. I took my last oxy 2 weeks ago. Im finally starting to sleep again and i feel great. If there is anyone out there thats reading this who thinks its impossible to kick that shit without going to a rehab.....im living proof......and also both of my brother in laws had about the same level of addiction, and both of them are clean now too......all of us in the last 4-5 months. If anyone wants or has any advice feel free to e mail me. If i did it anyone can. Good luck to everyone!   Name:Donna J.Matos Email:[email protected] State: Type:Death Story Date:5/18/2002 Hi;i signed the previous guest book but since there is a new one I will tell my story.On Sept.08,2001,I lost my beautiful son at the age of 19 due to an Oxy Contin drug overdose.There are no words to describe this.He was my world.He was the kindest,sweetest,affectionate child,and was so so protective of his sister,she was the most important thing in his life.I cant even begin to tell you what he meant to us.A lot of people think this drug has to be mixed to cause death,not true.My child's toxicology report showed no other drug but Oxy Contin.I think the most important thing I can express here is ACCOUNTABILITY.My son was there for so many of his friends but where were they when he needed them.He was with four girls that night,and one was aware of what he was on but yet she states she wasn't going to play his mother.Thus taking away my right forever to be his mom.She just dumped him like it was nothing,this hurts me to no end.I also think that anyone who knows a child has a drug problem has to be accountable for them,since they cant be accountable for themselselves.Kids or parents even if you have to call their parents annon.please let them know.So many children will be saved that way.Here is a poem I wrote for my child: My Son Elliot Jr. But 19 short years on this earth God took you from us too soon The pain we bear we can never erase God how we long to see your face If tears could bring you back you would soon re appear God in heaven,I need you near You are our joy the love of our life The pain it cuts deep like a knife Elly I love you more than words can say It's with you I hope to be with some day Elly it was too much to battle your addiction Now your at peace with no more affliction Elly I told you all of your life I will fight for you,when you can't fight for yourself So on I go trying to hold my head high Fighting the fight that took your life. Donna Jeannette Matos Copyright �2002 Donna Jeannette Matos My Sons Quote:Peace Out,One Love,173. ELLIOT JOSEPH MATOS JR. 12-27-81-09-08-01 REST IN PEACE BABY

Page: 929 of 931

[ Page 1 ] [ Previous ] [ Next ] [ Page 931 ]