View All General Comment Abuse Story Death Story Chronic Pain Story       Please sign our Guestbook Name:Jesse Balczuk Email: Type:Abuse Story Date:1/26/2003 I am nineteen years old and I have just gone through the worst experience of my life. I quit oxys. Two years ago, when I tried ox for the first time, I was so happy that I cried. I believe that I described the feeling that night as "emotional utopia." I snorted approximately 30mg and I remember laying in my boyfriend's arms looking at him with tears of happiness in my eyes. I think back and pinpoint that night as the beginning of my downward spiral into a junkie. Over the next year, I used ox as a recreational drug, as most kids do with alcohol. I would go to parties, and everyone would be getting drunk, and I would slip into the bathroom, snort some ox and nod out in a corner. After my senior prom, my friends and I all got a hotel room and spent the night crushing and snorting. Graduation night, same thing. Oxys became my fuel, and they made me depressed. My boyfriend and I broke up for four months, but during that time we remained tied through ox. For my birthday, he gave me an 80. Whenever he and I had any contact, we would be doing ox together. It's funny, because our relationship didn't start out with ox, and I hope to God that it won't end with it. He and I got back together about 7 months ago and we have lived together ever since. Every morning we would wake up and be in such pain, it was a challenge to roll out of bed and crush that eye-opener ox to start the day. It was easy to get and still is. I could call any number of my acquaintences and get as much ox as I desire. However, those days when we couldn't get our morning fix, there was no day to be had. If we didn't have our ox to wake up to, there was no getting out of bed. Those days were painful. On a day like that, we would pay up to $200 for an 80. I was at the point where I could easily snort 160mg in one shot...and I did. That was the best way to fall asleep...nodding out after banging out an 80, with a cigarette in my hand, and then waking up in a frenzy after burning myself or setting my blankets on fire. If I had to estimate how much money he and I have put up our noses in the past two years, I would approximate the street value at about $200,000. Imagine what we could have done with that money. For the past couple of months I have tried to quit, but it was impossible to do in my hometown where oxys are so readily available to me. Any time that I would start going through withdrawal, I would just do a little bit...maybe 10mg or so. But that would escalate and I just couldn't do it. I checked into a rehab program about four blocks away from my house. Needless to say, I returned home the next day and began using again. I finally got the courage to isolate myself from ox. I went to New York to visit my mother and sisters for about a week, and I brought no ox with me. This was it. I was quitting cold turkey. After snorting 30mg before I left, of course. After the first night I called home to my boyfriend, who was 275 miles away (thank God), and told him I should have at least brought 40mg with me or something. I was dying. But I couldn't have expected what was to come. The next night I tossed and turned all night, unable to get comfortable, wanting to crawl out of my skin. My joints were inflamed with pain, and I had chills that I could not get rid of. The next day I went to the doctor and explained my situation, and she really didn't know much about it. I was prescribed clonidine, and a sleep aid, but she suggested that I go through a detox program. I wanted to do it on my own, however, so I went home and after not eating for two days, I tried to choke down some food and I began vomiting out of control, and I had the most horrible headache. My mother realized that this was not normal and I had to tell her the truth. She knew that I had abused and been addicted to oxys, but I told her that I had quit. She was dissappointed, but very supportive. The next day I could hardly walk and then the diarrhea began. I tried to go to a movie with my mother and her friend, and after about thirty minutes keeling over in my seat, I rushed out to the car and vomited a large quantity of bright yellow fluid. I was taken to the hospital, and I needed to be rehydrated with an IV stuck in my arm, since this was day three with no food and little beverage. It is now day five and I am still weak and the diarrhea is tapering off, but I think the worst is over. I hope. My best advice is to NEVER try oxycontin, because it starts out as "emotional utopia," but leads to hell, because you can never get enough, IT CONTROLS EVERY MINUTE OF EVERY DAY! All you can think about is when you get to do that next line and feel that wonderful high. And for those of you who want to quit, you can't do it alone. You need to get away from the ox before you can quit for real. I return home tomorrow to my hometown, where all I need to do is make a phone call, and I can have ox at my fingertips. But, after this week, I now know that I will never touch it again after what I have been through.   Name:JW Moore Email:[email protected] Type:General Comment Date:1/23/2003 I appear to be in the minority of people who have taken Oxycontin for its intended purpose, and in the appropriate manner. I was in an auto accident in March 1999 and have been in serious pain ever since. After being passed along from Dr. to Dr. with nothing stronger than Percoset, I found a pain specialist who prescribed Oxycontin to me. It offered some relief for my pain, but the side-effects were unpleasant -- esp. the sense of imminent suffocation -- and stopped taking it. Cold turkey, to the amazement of my primary care doc. I've subsequently tried several other opiates, including a second go-round of Oxycontin, with varying levels of success, and eventually stopped taking opiates altogether. One reason was the increasing difficulty finding pharmacies that carried Oxycontin, Dilaudid, etc. Another was that the pain specialist lost his licence because one -- ONE! -- patient was found abusing Oxycontin. My point is that Oxycontin, like any drug, can be abused to the point of death. But it has also helped many people who are in debilitating pain. Stigmatizing the drug as you do hurts many more people than it helps.   Name:Tessa Email:[email protected] Type:Death Story Date:1/23/2003 My father died on oxycontin on 06-03-02 he was born 06-21-56 **He had been in alot of pain for many years .. no one knew one day we would come home and find him dead on the bedroom floor .. My mom to this day blames herself to this day for not doing something sooner..she feels she cannot go on any longer to this day i dont know what to do to help her ..

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